Why Can't I Ever Be Good Enough? Escaping the Limits of Your Childhood Roles - Softcover

Rubin-Deutsch, Joan

2.17

6 ratings by Goodreads

9781572243149: Why Can't I Ever Be Good Enough? Escaping the Limits of Your Childhood Roles

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1572243147 ISBN 13: 9781572243149

Publisher: New Harbinger Pubns Inc, 2003

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The limits on an adult life were set in childhood, according to therapist Joan Rubin-Deutsch, in damaging "contracts" that were written without the consent, understanding, or best interests of the child in mind. In Why Can’t I Ever Be Good Enough? Robin-Deutsch explains how to identify which contracts are still in force, what it takes to break them, and how to rewrite or create brand-new contracts that will lead to more satisfying lives.

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From the Publisher:

Unlike comparable books on "toxic" families, our book offers adults from many different kinds of families real tools for change. Therapists have long told us that we need to do away with unhealthy roles from childhood, but here is a book that offers a clear, simple concept (contracts), and way of making that change (rewriting contracts). For people who grew up with parents who couldn't be trusted to establish reliable rules or expectations and today are uncomfortable with who they are, who may believe they are not worthy of love, and who are confused about what they need and want from love and work and life. Women who seek treatment for these issues are 20 and over, while men are usually 40 and over.

From the Inside Flap:

Create your own contracts for the life you want to be living.

As a child, you created unspoken and binding internal contracts with yourself that stated, "If I behave in a certain way, my parents will give me what I need in return." When your needs weren’t met, you believed it was because you weren’t good enough. As an adult, these contracts continue to influence your relationship with yourself and others.

In "Why Can’t I Ever Be Good Enough?" Joan Rubin-Deutsch guides you through a program that teaches you how to transform unhealthy feelings, thoughts, behaviors, and relational patterns that are affecting your ability to experience your life joyfully. You will learn to listen to your own powerful voice, identify and break old, unworkable contracts, and envision and design new contracts that enable you to create the life you really desire.

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