Why Animals Sleep So Close to the Road (and other lies I tell my children) - Softcover

Konig, Susan

3.44

77 ratings by Goodreads

9780989538114: Why Animals Sleep So Close to the Road (and other lies I tell my children)

Softcover

ISBN 10: 0989538117 ISBN 13: 9780989538114

Publisher: Willow Street Press LLC, 2015

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Susan Konig's first book offers a uniquely frank look at the modern family by "an exceptional humorist on the order of Erma Bombeck and Jean Kerr" (Library Journal). The Konigs can barely turn around in a city apartment that seems to be shrinking. With Baby #3 on the way, they take drastic measures: They buy a house and move to The 'Burbs. Countless sticky adventures ensue. In her hilariously unflinching account of motherhood and domestic pursuits, Konig shares a supermom's little secrets, from the importance of Cheerios to the truth about Bambi's mother ("she was running an errand").

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About the Author:

Parade Magazine says of Teenagers & Toddlers Are Trying to Kill Me!: "Surviving parenthood is never so funny as when Susan Konig tells tales of the joyful chaos that is life with her four children." Susan began her career schlepping shopping bags for Washington Post fashion editor Nina Hyde. Once she learned to type (a skill she lied about to get the job), she was put to work writing features for the paper's Style section. She moved on to Seventeen magazine in the big 80's as a fashion, beauty and trends editor. (Think shoulder pads, mousse and helicopter earrings.) In the nineties, her twice weekly column for the New York Post delighted millions...and irritated dozens. Her articles and essays have appeared in many national publications including Ladies' Home Journal, Travel & Leisure, First for Women and Parade. Her short fiction was published in Barbie magazine, including the tear-jerker "Midge's Wedding." Susan was co-host of the popular Speak Now...with Dave and Susan Konig on Sirius Satellite radio. The motherhood columnist and her Emmy Award-winning comedian husband interviewed celebrities, athletes and authors for three hours a day entertaining loyal listeners across the country and internationally. Her first book Why Animals Sleep So Close to the Road (and Other Lies I Tell My Children) was called "brilliant, witty, and downright Bombeckian" by USA Today. Her follow-up I Wear the Maternity Pants in This Family was a Parade Pick in Parade magazine.

From Publishers Weekly:

"Sure, sure, it's important to tell your kids the truth. Except when it's better to flat out lie," writes Konig, a former columnist for the New York Post, in her witty first book about the realities of being a modern-day mother. Filled with warm family anecdotes and belly laughs, the book deals with such universal subjects as living in cramped quarters, dealing with the demise of beloved pets (or unwanted roadside varmints) and overcoming the perils of house hunting, pregnancy and childbirth, to name a few. But the book's primary focus is on the struggle of balancing family life with working at home. (Readers will identify with Konig when she describes having to hide all the pens in her house from her son, who likes to write on furniture, and then not being able to find a pen when she needs one.) Despite its humorous tone, readers will often be touched by the more sensitive moments, like Konig's depiction of her two-year-old comforting the family's dying cat: "My son had just learned how to be gentle with her. He'd go over to her spot by the heater and pet her so softly and say, 'Oh, key-kat.'" No topic is too personal for Konig, who even includes details of her family's financial situation, but she always approaches these difficult subjects with good humor. Though this debut will hold particular interest for harried parents, even single women will be delighted by this amusing glimpse into American family life.
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