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TIME FOR A BETTER MARRIAGE is designed to help you better understand your marriage. You will learn important skills that will improve your relationship. Basic to the development of this book are the following principles:
1. Developing and maintaining a good relationship requires a time commitment. For your marriage relationship to succeed, you must make it a priority now and in the future.
2. Specific skills that are essential to a healthy marriage can be learned. When you understand how a marriage works and the necessary skills for building a satisfying marriage, you can develop the skills that create a positive and rewarding relationship.
3. Change often takes time and all change begins with you. The first step in creating a satisfying marriage involves a commitment to change. You begin by understanding what your role in the marriage has been and what you can do to make it different. Be patient in your growth and allow for different rates of change. As you proceed through the book, some weeks will produce wonders and others will produce little apparent change.
4. Feelings of love and caring that have diminished or disappeared often return when behavior changes. In the normal ebb and flow of relationship, some days we are close to one another while others are distant. Romantic feelings, intimacy and love often diminish over time in a marriage relationship. When feelings change, many couples believe the relationship is over. This need not be the case. A change of feelings may mean that you and your partner are not being reinforced in the marriage and that the relationship deserves a higher priority. It is important at such times to act as if all were well. By acting as if your relationship is the intimate, satisfying relationship you desire, new behaviors and feelings can be established.
5. Small changes are very important in bringing about big change. A happier relationship results from many small changes over a period of time. Even though both you and your partner are committed to change, there may be times when unwanted patterns reappear. This does not mean that the new skills you are learning are not working in your marriage. Continue to focus on the positive relationship you desire and these times of testing will pass.
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